Dysfunctional Family?

Well, yesterday I was told I am a part of a dysfunctional family, wow, I didn't even know we were dysfunctional. Do I need to act different or what? What makes a dysfunctional family? Let's look a little bit at history. Was Andy Griffith's family dysfunctional because it was just Andy, Aunt Bee and Opie and no Mom? Was the Cleaver family on Leave it to Beaver functional because June stayed home all day wearing pearls and high heels and cleaned house all day? Was the Cosby household on the Bill Cosby show functional because there was a mother and father, 5 children and grandparents? But then the daughter moved out and then moved back in so did they become dysfunctional?

Have you ever really thought about that term and how easily it is used in conversations describing family units or sometimes just describing people. When you look up the definition of dysfunctional this is what you will find:
"Abnormal or impaired functioning, especially of a bodily system or social group" or "a consequence of a social practice or behavior pattern that undermines the stability of a social system".
To me this states that a dysfunctional family is one that has some abnormal behavior with in the unit of the family that effects the family as a whole. Now think about this. First off, what is normal behavior. Can you in 3 simple sentences describe normal behavior in a family that could be used in all family situations?

In every family, with more than one individual, there will probably be at one time a dysfunctional moment. In order to be a functional family, you do not have to model the Cleaver or Cosby family, I think the Andy Griffith family was quite functional. I have seen many family situations that are not the perfect set up, but yet they are functioning quite well.

Dysfunctional family could describe every family at one time or another. However, this to me is a strong term implying a family that never has "normal" times or good times. Yes, some families are like that I'm sure, but not the majority. So enjoy your family, appreciate the fact even though you are related by blood or have lived together for a long time there will be differences in how you react to situations and what you believe. Celebrate these differences because they
make the whole family unit better and stronger.

Do I have a dysfunctional family? My answer is no. Do I live in a family with interesting characters? The answer is yes. Do I appreciate all of their differences? Unfortunately the answer is not always yes. But I'm working on it.